As our children grow up, each year is a milestone worth celebrating. If planning a birthday party is something your child wants, it can either be a fun experience or complete torture for Mom and Dad. Know that you have options, and there’s more than one way to plan a party. I’ve got ten helpful tips to guide you through party planning.

Lock-down the 3 “must-haves.” Keep things simple by asking your son or daughter to name three “must-haves” that will make the party great. You can provide some guidance by offering some categories like a favorite food to serve, activity, theme, or location. Once you agree to the three things needed to make your child happy with his or her party, base all other decisions on your time, budget, and preferences.

“I ask my daughter to choose a theme, and what type of cake she wants, then I run with the remaining details.” Kristina Simone, mom to a 7-year old

The guest list. Your guest list can be as extensive as you like as long as you have the space, money, and lots of food. As your child grows, consider keeping the guest count to a manageable number based on the amount of help you’ll have. Generally, you can expect about 60% of guests to attend a party, so for older kids, sending out 10-15 invitations is reasonable.

“You should do what feels right for you and not feel pressured to invite every single kid in your child’s class unless of course, that’s what you want.” Alison Bogan, mom of three

Location, location, location. The site you choose is vital in setting the tone, but also in helping you stay on track. You’d be surprised how costly and demanding a party at home can be so that you might opt for a simpler party at one of Monterey’s many “kid-zones.” You generally pay per person so you know the party price ahead of time, entertainment is built-in, and you don’t have to worry about strawberry stains on your white rug. If you prefer some ambiance, take advantage of our beautiful Monterey weather and host a pool, beach or park party. Outdoor parties allow for less mess and some flexibility if you’d like to add in some personal touches.

Time it Out. Depending on the season, potential party guests may be traveling or spending extra time with family. You might consider timing your party so as not to interfere with weekend family plans or look to hosting a weekday party during the summer months.

Sleepovers aside, 2-4 hours should allow plenty of time for fun and is the typical time allotted when booking a venue. Allow the first 15-30 minutes for guests to arrive and get settled. A simple idea to promote a pleasant party flow is to provide open play and refreshments as guests arrive, followed by one hour of activities, then half an hour for cake and presents, ending with another 30 minutes of open play until parents come.

“I considered nap times and busy weekend schedules and opted for a morning party when my daughter turned one.” Ashley King, mom to a 19-month-old

Fun times. Activities and entertainment have endless possibilities. The park and beach come with built-in entertainment. Try setting up a friendly T-ball tournament or sandcastle contest to make things interesting.

“For my daughter’s last birthday, she chose a fairy theme. I took a different approach, keeping it non-commercial, somewhat gender-neutral, and eco-friendly. The kids participated in a scavenger hunt with the goal of finding pieces of that would become a craft project to create their very own fairy garden. Most of the pieces were items from nature or other up-cycled materials like an acorn to be used as hats or popsicle sticks to make a fairy house door.” Kristina Simone, mom to a 7-year-old

Decor. Decor starts with a theme and location. You could save some time and money and skip it altogether, especially when hosting an outdoor party or one at one of the party venues. If you’re leaning toward some more memorable decorations, look for items that you could repurpose such as a banner or centerpiece that would work perfectly with your child’s room decor! Knowing you can repurpose one or more of the decorations might help the decorator in you feel better about spending a bit more on certain pieces that you’ll enjoy for more than just one day.

Food. Stick with what you know—this is not the time to go from the queen of take-out to master chef. Also, don’t feel the pressure to serve junk food. While it’s fine to do just one day a year, you probably don’t want a bunch of hyped-up kids running around. Order some simple pizzas paired with a veggie tray, several bowls of fruit, plain hummus, and baked chips or tortilla chips with mild salsa and simple guacamole. You can serve plain water alongside a strawberry-infused variety and if you want a sweeter option, add a pitcher of 100% pure juice to the table. If you have adults at the party, you can do all of the above and add in some of your favorite potluck-type dishes great for serving larger crowds or opt for catering.

“For my son’s first birthday I wanted to be present, so I ordered catering from a taco place for just about $10 per person. The caterers brought the food and cleaned up the mess, leaving me to celebrate the big milestone for our family.” Kayla Naylor, mom of two

The big day. On the big day, try to relax. Whether parties are your thing or not, ask for help from family and friends, so you have the chance to take it all in. Also, remember to celebrate you and your spouse! Pop open a special bottle of champagne and toast to another year as parents. Celebrate the excellent job you, your spouse, and your community have done in raising your little human.

Not your average goodie bag. As you wrap-up yet another year’s celebration, goodie bags and thank you cards to think about. In thanking your guests, aim to give goodie bags with purpose. Use a reusable bag or container and fill it with creative items to keep things fun without excess waste or a sugar-overload.

Thank you notes. Finally, include kids over age 3 in writing thank you notes. Pick out a simple or themed card and either help them write a message or have them participate, recalling each gift and the kind friend who gave it to your child. While a hand-written thank you note is very thoughtful, you could opt for an e-card to save on paper.

Regardless of how “Pinterest-worthy” or relaxed and practical your child’s party turns out, remember that you’re giving special recognition to another year of your child’s growth, another year of joy and learning ahead!