A mom’s guide to saying yes — to adventure, to yourself, and to life. Because the best moments don’t wait for the “right time.”
Last year, for Mother’s Day weekend, six moms and I went backpacking in Yosemite National Park. Our ages ranged from 34 to 66. Two had never backpacked before. Two go once a year. One hadn’t gone in over a decade. And one was a personal trainer who made the rest of us question our life choices on the uphill.
And it was magical.
Not because it was easy—it wasn’t. The trail challenged us. Packs were heavy. Muscles were sore. But somewhere between the laughter, the shared snacks, and the quiet moments in nature, something shifted. We weren’t just moms that weekend. We were women, strong, capable, curious, and fully alive. And those feelings are something too many of us forget.
THE YES THAT CHANGES EVERYTHING
I have a simple philosophy: SAY YES! Say yes to the trip. Say yes to the invite. Say yes to the thing that lights something inside you, even when it feels inconvenient, impractical, or just a little bit crazy. Yes, even when you are tired. As moms, we are always tired!
Some of my most unforgettable moments have come from that one decision. Like the night my friend and I found ourselves at 1 a.m. along the Merced River, watching a mountain lion balance effortlessly on a stone wall. Silent. Powerful. Unreal.
You don’t plan moments like that. When you say yes, those moments find you.
STOP WAITING FOR THE “RIGHT TIME”
I tried for years to see Yosemite blanketed in snow. Every attempt was blocked with storms, dry winters, Covid closures, and life. Then one weekend, after a late night of dancing with my son and a full day of Sunday responsibilities, I looked at my calendar and realized, it’s now or it will yet be another year.
So, I got in the car and drove four and a half hours. No perfect plan. Not ideal timing. Just a small window, a decision, and flexibility.
I just made it into the valley as the sun was setting. I pulled over, not even in the “right” spot, and heard cheering echo through the valley. I had completely forgotten it was the timing of the Firefalls. I looked up, saw this incredible phenomenon, took a few not-so-good pictures, then I closed my eyes, smiled, and just took it all in.
That’s the thing about saying yes, you don’t always get what you expect. Sometimes you get something better.
THE MYTH OF “LATER”
We tell ourselves we’ll do it later. When work slows down. When the kids are older. When life feels less full. But later is a moving target. Later, the coffee gets cold. Later, the day turns into night. Later, people grow up. Later, life moves on.
And too often, we forget who we were before all the responsibilities of adulting. We lose our spark, and the “later” becomes regret.
WHAT I’VE LEARNED (THE HARD WAY)
For years, like so many women, I poured everything into building a life for everyone else. I was raising my kids, growing a business, and showing up for my community. And I loved it. I still do.
But somewhere along the way, I started to disappear. It wasn’t obvious. It never is. It looks like being responsible. Reliable. Needed. Until one day you realize you don’t quite remember what fills you up anymore.
For me, I found it again outside. In the mountains. On the trails. In the quiet, wild places that ask nothing of me except to show up and just be me. But here’s the important part: It doesn’t have to be nature. Your “thing” might be yoga. Or painting. Or listening to live music. Or just sitting alone with a good book and a cup of coffee . . . or wine.
It doesn’t matter what it is. It matters that it’s yours. That it fills you with energy and brings a smile.
WHY IT MATTERS MORE
THAN YOU THINK
Taking time for yourself isn’t selfish. It’s maintenance. It’s survival. It’s leadership. It’s a good example for our kids. When I take a weekend each month just for me, no roles, no responsibilities, just space, I come back different. More patient. Energized. Ready to be fully present for my family.
And the people in my life feel that. But even more importantly, they see it. We spend so much time teaching our kids to take care of themselves, to be independent, to know their worth. But are we showing them how? Because they are always watching. Learning from our actions and not necessarily from our words.
THE POWER OF SAYING YES TOGETHER
That’s what made our Mother’s Day backpacking trip so special. It wasn’t just about the miles or the destination. It was about six women choosing themselves, together. We cheered each other on. We laughed through the hard parts. We shared stories, fears, and dreams. We even shed a few tears.
And somewhere along the way, we remembered who we are outside of everything we carry. That kind of connection? It’s powerful. It’s something every mom deserves.
GIVE YOURSELF PERMISSION
Here’s what I know now, without hesitation:
• You cannot give your best to everyone else if you are running on empty.
• You don’t need permission from your partner. Your kids. Your job. Your mother.
• You need permission from yourself. To take the trip. To try that thing. To rest. To explore. To live fully, not just for others, but for yourself AS yourself. Because you are still in there. Not just a mom. Not just the one who holds everything together. YOU. And you deserve to get as much as you give.
ALWAYS SAY YES
Some of the best adventures take less than 24 hours to plan and last a lifetime. Take that last-minute trip. Respond with that spontaneous yes. A small decision can change everything.
So, here’s your reminder: Don’t wait. Don’t overthink it. Don’t push yourself to the bottom of the list. Stop feeling guilty.
Say yes. Your version might look different than mine, and that is okay. Find what brings you joy. Because we only get one life. And it’s meant to be lived fully! We are worth it.
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