GRANDPARENTING 102: Thursday, November 8; 5:30-7:30 pm. This class will look at grandparenting the school-age child. Classes held at the Monterey Youth Museum, 425 Washington St, Monterey. Pre-register at 831-649-6444 or info@mymuseum. Class fee is $25 per person.
With the approaching holiday season and visits with extended family, consider using the time together to learn more, ask questions, and pay attention to family history.
What do you remember about the stories you heard from your grandparents? Did they tell you tales about your parent when they were young? I remember that it was particularly fun to hear about my father “getting in trouble” for pranks he played on his siblings. This upstanding, proper, professional man that I knew did that?
I recently had a conversation with a cousin I have not seen for decades. We talked about our parents, all passed on now and then moved to talk about our mutual grandparents. Because she lived close to our Grandmother, whom I only occasionally visited, my cousin was able to share her memories about things I never knew. I gained a new respect and love for my grandmother as a result.
Researching family history has become a national hobby. In the book “Unconditional Love: A Guide to Navigating the Joys and Challenges of Being a Grandparent Today” author Jane Isay says: “Our lives have touched at least five generations. In most families, that amounts to a century. History and people and events, joys and tragedies, happiness and craziness–all these elements are embraced in the generations that form our families.”
There is particular value for children to hear these stories. Researchers Marshall P. Duke and Robyn Fivush from Emory University have discovered that this shared information nurtures children emotionally and psychologically. Isay writes: “These researchers report that children who are informed about their family history have higher self-esteem, a better sense of their capacity to control what happens to them, and lower levels of anxiety. These qualities turn out to be important for success in life.”
Don’t be shy about initiating conversations with your children and grandchildren and sharing stories of your past. Bring a few photo albums with you and talk to your grandchildren about their ancestors. Share stories about your parents and grandparents. Talk to your grandchildren about your childhood and holiday celebrations from their parents’ childhoods. Your grandchildren will delight in seeing photos of you when you were their age and hearing about how things have changed.
The holidays are a perfect time to bring the generations together through shared stories so don’t miss this unique opportunity to bond with your grandchildren.
May you have a happy and memorable holiday season!
Here are some books that can guide you: “The Story of Me and My Grandma (or Grandpa)” from Parragon Books; and “From Grandmother With Love: A Personal History For My Grandchild” by Kelly & Regan.
Gail Root, M.A., facilitates Roots and Wings Parent Coaching and from Cradle to College & Guidance for Grandparents. You can get information at www.rootsandwingsparentcoaching.com. Gail is Nama to Quinn, age 6 ½; Spencer, 3 ½ and twins Reece & Kendall, 1 ½.
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