I am raising a zoologist. At least that is what I have been informed by my ten-year-old daughter lately. She first wants to be a zoologist and then study marine science because she really wants to study narwhals to help protect them. In case you are unfamiliar, narwhals are also known as the unicorns of the sea because of the single tusk (really, a tooth) that grows from their mouth and through their upper lip. She has been enamored with them for a while and has been inspired by a YouTuber she watches, who is a zoologist and describes strange and bizarre, usually menacing and often deadly, animals around the world. This YouTuber ends her segments with “Stay curious. The world has a lot for us to learn,” which makes my daughter interested to learn more about animals. As a parent, I love that she has set her aspirations high, and I want to encourage her to develop skills to help her toward that career.
In the recent past, she wanted to be a linguist because she was interested in how people learn language and the origins of how things get their names. Another time, she wanted to be a gymnastics coach like hers. At one point, she wanted to be a barista because she thought it would be fun to work at a certain green-aproned coffee shop, and she could work fast getting orders out. Her speed at completing work tasks is not one I have seen at home, but nonetheless, not a bad skill to encourage. She has said she wanted to be a teacher and work in a school like hers. I think, at various times, she may have mentioned wanting to be a restaurant server, a dancer, a make-up artist, a veterinarian, a writer, a chef, and maybe a combination of two. It may seem like these are just fantasies for kids, but how parents respond to kids’ musings about careers can shape their motivation.
Research supports the idea that young children voice career choices based on the physical aspects of a job and those professions with which they are familiar. A young child might say they want to be a firefighter because they get to use the fire hose and ride around in the fire truck all day. Or, they may say that they want to be a teacher because they recognize what a teacher does or a football player because they have seen them on TV. At this point, it is good for parents to point out all the kinds of jobs that are out there that kids may not recognize as jobs—accountant? landscape designer? city planner? In addition, parents can point out the skills necessary to be successful at these jobs, like work ethic, listening to others, studying hard, and mastering certain skills, as means to help kids connect their fantasies with skills to get there.
In elementary school and through middle school, kids start recognizing the skills they have, the things they like to do, and they begin connecting them to careers. A kid might say, “I’m good at science, and I like the weather. I want to be a meteorologist.” Or, you might hear, “I’m really good at soccer, so I am going to be a professional soccer player.” Although some of these aspirations may be challenging to achieve, kids are demonstrating some understanding of their own self-awareness and how that might reflect on a career. For parents, it is natural to want to encourage your kid in things they are good at because you want them to have continued success and build confidence. At the same time, there is good evidence that encouraging their hard work to become proficient at a skill can help sustain their motivation and efforts. For my daughter, I am talking to her about what she thinks zoologists need to be able to do. She said, “Zoologists have to ask a lot of questions.” I agreed and know that she exercises this skill already. I further explained other skills that I thought might be useful, like understanding science, working with a team, writing results, and others. She is starting to realize that she will need to build skills other than just petting a narwhal.
In elementary school, career talk comes out with social comparison and kids’ recognition of who is “good” at what class subject. Some kids can then adopt an attitude of “I am not good at X” and think some career pathways are out of reach. Instead, parents can support efforts toward getting better at school subjects and also point out less academic, school-oriented traits that are developing and useful for careers. Certainly, leadership among peers, compassion, skills at including others, teamwork, public speaking, organization, grit and hard work, creativity, and more all have value in careers but may not show up on a worksheet or test.
There is good evidence that parents’ early talk about preparation for careers can result in higher aspirations for kids. For example, it is more likely that kids who have parents talking to them about going to college or other advanced training have kids who are more likely to do so. As the dad of a future zoologist, I am giving her feedback on her potential pathway to achieve her goal hoping that, despite whatever path she takes, she stays curious and interested in learning about the world.
ROBERT (ROB) S. WEISSKIRCH, MSW, Ph.D., CFLE, is a Professor of Human Development at California State University, Monterey Bay, and is a Certified Family Life Educator. He and his wife are parents to a chatty, elementary school-aged daughter and reside in Marina.