If this will be the first Christmas, Hanukkah, or New Year’s celebration with your new grandchild, you might want to take a little time to think about how to approach the coming holidays. There are health issues, gift giving, and chore divisions to consider. If the baby is brand new, it’s even more important to think about and then clearly communicate with the grandchild’s parents and other family members who will be participating in the celebration.
Baby’s Health: Your priority should be protecting the health of your grandchild. If you are feeling under the weather or exhibiting any symptoms of disease such as a cough, fever, or rash, you need to be cleared by a physician before spending time with your newborn grandchild. This goes for all attendees at holiday events. This is an area where you can help your grandchild’s parents by keeping an eye out for ill health that might compromise the child. It can be difficult for a new parent to speak up–especially to an older relative–but no one will think twice about grandma stepping in to advocate for the baby. Remind friends and family to wash their hands, use sanitizer, and try to keep the “passing the baby” game to a minimum. It’s also ok to suggest that baby’s face not be kissed.
Some parents have found that wearing baby snuggled in a wrap makes it easier to keep the baby from being passed from person to person.
As a grandparent who will (hopefully!) be spending lots of time with the new bundle of joy there are several recommended vaccines:
- Tdap (tetanus, diphtheria, pertussis). Tetanus and diphtheria are rare in the United States today, but vaccines are still needed to make sure they remain rare. Pertussis (whooping cough), on the other hand, is a highly contagious respiratory illness that continues to spread.
- Flu vaccine. In addition to protecting you, the vaccine helps protect your grandkids from the flu, which can be dangerous for them. Children under the age of five are at higher risk of serious flu-related complications. Also, because their immune systems aren’t fully developed, children have a high risk of contracting the flu. And babies under the age of 6 months are too young to receive a flu shot, so it’s especially important to protect them from flu germs.
- MMR (measles, mumps, rubella). If you were born after 1957 and are not immune to measles, you should have the vaccine. A simple blood test can check your immunity level.
Additionally, if you are over 65, you may want to consider a shingles vaccine and a pneumonia vaccine.
How to Help: As grandparents, aunties, uncles, and friends, of course, we are ready and willing to “help” by holding the baby. An even better way to help is to cook and serve food, clear the table, and serve drinks all while the parents sit comfortably and enjoy this special time with their baby.
Also, if mom and baby are learning how to nurse, being in a public place may not be the most comfortable setting, so honor mom if she disappears from the crowd for a bit to feed the baby, or even take a rest.
Gift Giving: Of course, grandparents want to purchase cute clothes, stuffed toys, and lots of sweet stuff made for babies. Be sure to ask baby’s mother and father what their preferences for gifts are before you take out the credit card. They may prefer no plastic items, or they may already have more stuffed animals than they can display. They may also have not received a few items from their gift registry that would be put to use immediately and make a great holiday gift. You may also consider reducing the gifts entirely and setting up and contributing to a college fund for your grandchild.
My favorite gifts for my grandchildren have been books. Plus, a holiday ornament with baby’s name on it. When your grandchild has grown and is ready to create their family traditions, you can gift them with a set of well-loved ornaments that have been collected through the years.
Building memories, isn’t that what holidays are all about? Wishing you and your family the best for a relaxed and happy holiday.
Gail Root, M.A., facilitates Roots and Wings Parent Coaching and from Cradle to College & Guidance for Grandparents. You can get information at www.rootsandwingsparentcoaching.com. Gail is Nama to Quinn, age 6 ½; Spencer, 3 ½ and twins Reece & Kendall, 1 ½.